When families first hear “detach with love,” they usually picture one of two things.

Cold distance. Or abandonment.

Neither is what it means.

Detaching is not leaving the relationship. It is leaving the chaos inside it. It is choosing not to argue with the addiction, not because you do not care, but because you have finally understood that arguing with it has never once worked.

You can love someone completely and still refuse to be pulled into their spiral. Those two things are not in conflict. In fact, the second one might be the most loving thing you ever do.

Disappearing is giving up on them. Detaching is refusing to disappear yourself.

There is a difference. And it matters.

Speak soon,
Kate

P.S. If you have been afraid that setting boundaries means you do not love them enough, that fear is worth talking through. Book a connection call here.