What Do Honesty and Willingness Have to Do With Recovery?

October 20, 2023
Text post that reads, "Addiction can't survive when it's surrounded by recovery."

I did a TikTok live last week about honesty and willingness (if you’re on TikTok, you can follow me here), and someone commented about their loved one, “But she has to want it.”

That statement fires me up more than anything else, and here’s why:

All of our loved ones who are struggling with drug and alcohol addiction want recovery.

Even if your loved one is saying they don’t want it, they do.

You see, we all have different parts of ourselves. And for someone in active addiction, one part of them is the addicted part—their brain has become hardwired to use or drink, they have no coping skills, they have poor decision-making skills, they have poor impulse control, they need to use to get the relief their addiction seeks.

The other part of them, which at times may be big and at other times as small as a mustard seed, wants to recover. This other part of them doesn’t want the life they are living. It doesn’t want to die.

Everyone’s different, and depending on the progression of their disease, their want might be tiny, but everybody has it.

Know it is in there.

There’s that saying, “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.” At Tipping Point we add on, “But you can make it thirsty.”

That’s what our programs help you do: make your loved one thirsty for recovery and open up the window of willingness within them.

Now, if your loved one is already willing, if they are fully onboard with going to treatment and getting better, have them call me. I’ll help them get into treatment.

If your loved one is not yet willing, that’s what our programs help with.

They do it by helping you get better first, particularly with how you respond. By helping you to stop buying the story, stop being manipulated, to catch a breath, to find yourself again. And as a result of doing those things, your loved one changes.

Because it’s really hard to keep doing that same old thing around recovered people who aren’t cosigning the story, who have healthy, strong boundaries for their own lives, who are raising the bar in their own lives.

That kind of environment makes it impossible for addiction to thrive. It snuffs it out. And it does it in a way that allows you to connect with your loved one so you both can become stronger than the addiction.

So here’s the deal:

If your loved one is willing and wants help finding treatment, introduce them to me over text (978-394-7788), and I’ll help get them help.

If your loved one is not currently willing, book a call with me here. I want to learn more about what’s happening, and we’ll discuss how I can help you get them there. We can find their willingness together.

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